Just after 2mins of her kissing me, she stopped and went
straight to my kitchen, as she was going, she said, “baby, I don’t
want to travel empty stomach so as not to collapse in the bus”.
Chai, wetin I go do?. The rehearsals are gone, the boldness to
frown at her is gone, I don’t even know if I should confront her
about her facebook messages, what if I do, what will be her
reaction?. A lot of thoughts was just running through my head.
She located my noodles carton and started cooking while we
Me: bimbe, what went wrong between you and your cousin?
Bimpe:. Don’t mind that my uncle jaree, I told him that I’m
returning today and that he should give me money but he refused
saying he doesn’t have money.
Me:***thinking in my mind that “so this girl is expecting me to
pay the return T.fare again?”***. really?, why will he do that to
his kid sister?
Bimpe:. He said I should wait till wednesday but I insist that I’m
returning today which is sunday
Me: that’s bad of him oooo. Did u offend him before now?
Bimpe: no ooooo. He is just a stingy relative. If not that I
mistakenly spoke with him about coming to akure to see
someone which Is you, then he insisted that I must come to his
place, in fact, he called my mum that I am coming to his place so
there is nothing I can do about it than to lodge at his place
Me: eeyah. That’s family bond. Family will always want to be
together. But wait, which area in this akure is he living?
Bimpe: somewhere around ijoka.
Me : ***then I remembered the address I saw in her facebook
chat was exactly ijoka. Sunday bustop to be precise***.
Baby, that is just 40mins journey from here ooo. Won’t I get to
meet my in-law facially?
Bimpe: I told you we aren’t in good terms. infact, I insulted him
this morning and left there with anger, so its not ideal for now,
maybe during my next visit.
Bimpe: baby, its 10:20am now and I should leave around 12pm
so as to get to PHC earlier. So what do u keep for me. Won’t you
buy provisions, cosmetics and cloth for your baby?
Me: I frowned and said BIMPE! U are very wicked and a bad
person, infact, I’m not happy with you, I should tell you this * I
have made up my mind to tell her she is a cheat, prostitute and a
Bimpe: *shocked*, she came closer, placed hand on my head,
takes it down to my chest and plants a kiss on my mouth. Then
she asked “what’s my offence my husband”
Me: ****with this little kiss and the soft touch from her palms plus
the seductive way she used the tip of her bosom to rub my back,
my brain was formatted again**** bimpe, I was sick since
yesterday which I told u about, u can’t even ask about my health,
all u can do is to ask for provisions, its unfair ooooo. ***dats all
I could utter, I don’t know what sealed my mouth***.
Immediately, she sat on my laps, rubbed my head with her
hands, pressed her bosoms on me harder and said “I’m sorry
baby”. I still wear a frown wondering why I lost the courage to
confront and rebuke her.
She noticed this and kissed me passionately this time. Its was
romantic that I enjoyed it. As we were kissing, my hand locate
her shirt button, I was about to loose it, she said “stop stop
stop”, the indomie should be burning by now, I need to go and
check it. She stood up from my laps and went to the kitchen
leaving me with hard on.
I said to myself again… Chaii onihaxy, u must be the greatest
fool of the first order………………………..
Just as I sat down sadly on the bed nursing my hard-on. She
called me from the kitchen to join her in eating the noodles. I
went to meet her in the kitchen. After finishing the noodles, I
went back to sit on the bed while she sat at the other edge of the
BIMPE: baby, I will miss you, if not for my cousin. I would have
lodge at your place
ME: its no problem.
BIMPE: hope you will also give me something to give my friends
at school because they will be expecting
ME: ok, dat reminds me. Now that your cousin refuse to give you
money, how will you get to PHC?
BIMPE: oh baby, I know you won’t watch me been stranded in
akure. After my cousin, u are the only person I have here. Pls
ME: but today is sunday and banks doesn’t open, how do I do it?
BIMPE: ****she suddenly wear a sad face and started shedding
tears**** pls onihaxy. I beg of you, pls use your ATM and help
me, I have a test of 4unit course tomorrow morning
please.******continue with the sad face****
ME: instantly, I felt pity for her, I felt her pain, I thought of her
test. I just don’t know where the MR nice guy in me came from. I
replied her that “don’t worry, I will try and get something from the
Bimpe was so happy that she kissed me again, this time it was
more romantic and passionate. I locate her shirt button again.
This time, she didn’t resist, I press on to her bra, dipped my hand
into it, located her Tips, I was squeezing and pressing. I traced
my hands down to her abdomen, still doing the kissing. Just as I
was about unzipping her trouser, she said “STOP”, I refused but
she removed her mouth and shifted a bit
BIMPE: baby, don’t you think its too early for us to have sex?. We
are going to get married and enjoy ourselves till eternity, why
should we rush?. And besides, this is our first date dear. Pls
******she wore this innocent girl look*******
I just wore a straight face and refuse to say anything. She
noticed that I am unhappy. So she came closer again in kissed
me. She started rubbing my chest, I was happy thinking she is
ready to play. Just as I was about pressing her bosoms, she held
my hand and say, “baby, pls hurry to the bank becos of time, I
will surprise you when you are back
Immediately I heard the word suprise, I suddenly smile and
became restless. I dashed into my wardrobe, picked up a shirt.
Picked my ATM card. Just as I was about stepping out of the
room, her phone was ringing******************
her phone was ringing, she picked. Though I
couldn’t hear the caller’s voice from the phone, but bimpe was
responding “ok, alright, ok, ok” on the phone and she dropped the
call. Before I could say anything, bimbe said “that is my roomate
at school. She is asking me the time I will get to PHC”.
I dashed out of the room. I stood outside my house for like
10minutes thinking all sort of things
“Am I actually a mumu?, what if she is right about having a
cousin?. After all, she will give me sex as a surprise before
leaving so I will actually taste her?. But should I tell her about
what I saw on facebook?,but what if she asked me how I get to
know her account details?, but if I don’t give her the money, how
will she get to PHC?. Or should I delay her till tomorrow so as to
enjoy her over the night?. But NO, she is having a 4 unit test
tomorrow. And bimpe is beautiful ooooo, I think I like her
naturally because if not, I won’t be this mumu for
her”************. The thoughts were just coming in and
overlapping, I don’t know what to opt for. At a point, I just made
up my mind to give her 5,000naira to manage. After all, I can’t
pay more than 5k if I invite a girl for home service. So let me just
zero my mind that I am paying only for the surprised sex and I
will assume that I lost the 10k I gave her earlier.
I stopped thinking and stopped a bike.
Bike man, take me to alagbaka. He said “bros na 150naira
oooo”. No problem, I replied. He rode pass through fiwasaye girls
college and finally dropped me in front of first bank opposite
captain cook at alagbaka junction.
On getting to first bank ATM, the crowd was so much, so I
decided to go to GTB atm adjacent first bank. The queue isn’t
that much. I am the 12th person on the queue. I was so anxious
to withdraw the money and go back home to meet my surprise
package, in fact, I insult anyone who stayed longer on the
When there about 6 people in front of me, something just struck
me that I should go to facebook and check her recent chats. This
time, I got the greatest shock of my life on what I
as I opened her message. She started a chat with
swordman 5minutes ago
SWORDMAN: baby, hi
BIMPE: sweetie, I’m fine. I so much enjoyed the way you make
love to me. It was the best I have ever had in my life.
Chaiii. I developed headache instantly. I scrolled up to read again
incase I didn’t get it very well, I continued reading
SWORD:. Same thing here, I so much miss ur orals. Infact, if not
for the test you said you want to write tomorrow, I won’t have let
you go today.
BIMPE: baby don’t worry, I will be back after the semester break.
I can’t wait to feel you again
SWORD: that’s my baby. How far with the place you said you are
going for your Tfare, I mean your daddy’s friend you talked
BIMPE: I’m there already, but he went out to bank to withdraw
money for me.
SWORD: why not come here for a quickee plssssss
BIMPE: time has gone and he will be back soon
SWORD: baby pls it won’t be long, I promise it won’t exceed
BIMPE:. Are u sure?
SWORD: I promise
BIMPE: ok dear, set the stage, don’t let me meet you with cloths
on and make sure its a hot ride. I will be there in a jiffy.
SWORD: ok dear, I will be waiting.
Chaiiii. I shouted and it attracted the attention of people on the
queue. They asked me what’s wrong but I couldn’t say anything.
I stepped out of the bank. And was wondering if I am not
dreaming. Just as I was thinking of what next to do. My phone
rang and its a message from bimpe which says “baby, pls I left
my school ID card at my cousins place, I am on way to get it. I
will be back in 20mins time pls”.
I don’t know when I started crying. I was crying like a baby on
the express. I said to myself. “This time, Onihaxy, u must teach
this bastard a lesson she will never forget in her life
TOADY’S QUESTION; WHAT WAS IMPRESSION WHEN YOU FIRST MEET YOUR FACEBOOK LOVE?